Tag: love

Susana Mayer’s “The PULSE” Interview – Aphrodisiacs can spark sexual imagination, but probably not libido

You can listen to my interview along with others on the PULSE radio show on Love and Lust. It can be heard again, tomorrow, Sunday June 14th at 10AM on 90.9FM or via the link below. My segment is the last 10 minutes.

http://www.newsworks.org/index.php/local/the-pulse/82765-science-of-aphrodisiacs 

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Reminder – this Tuesday, June 16th, the Erotic Literary Salon-Live.

 

 

Tonight-Dr. Lynn Hoffman at the Erotic Literary Salon-Live, SEXx Interactive Call for Proposals

Tonight, Oct 21, Featuring – Love Poems read by Dr. Lynn Hoffman, Adult Sex-Ed – Victorian vs Present day treatment of Masturbation discussion lead by me (Dr. Susana Mayer).

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SEXx Interactive Call for Proposals

SEXx Interactive: a journey for the mind, heart and body, will take place in Philadelphia May 7-9th, 2015 (in In honor of May being National Masturbation Month). We seek to: connect the complexities of the intellectual, spiritual, and physical dimensions of sexuality; create spaces for interaction and conversation across gender and sexual orientation; and support the empowerment of the curious and seasoned alike. This interactive forum will span several locations and engage participants with informational presentations, sexuality-based performances, “how-to” workshops, and sexually-themed art exhibitions. Everyone aged 18 and up is welcome to come and celebrate their sexuality at SEXx Interactive.To be considered for participation, please submit the following information NO LATER THAN 5PM on Friday, November 7, 2014. We embrace ALL to submit a proposal!

For more information, please contact Elicia at (215) 851-1822 or email at elicia@galaei.org.

This event is created by GALAEI: A Queer Latin@ Social Justice Organization, in collaboration with sex-positive community members. It is an expansion of the SEXx event that took place in May, 2014 (http://sexxphilly.tumblr.com)

 

 

 

Next Tuesday-October 21-The Erotic Literary Salon-Live-Lynn Hoffman-Featured Poet, Adult Sex-Ed Topic Masturbation

Reminder, please mark your calendars. Tuesday the award winning poet, Lynn Hoffman, will be the featured reader at next week’s Erotic Literary Salon in Philadelphia.

Lynn is not only a poet but author of several non-fiction books and novels. His most recent, Radiation Days: The Rollicking, Lighthearted Story of a Man and His Cancer can be found on Amazon http://www.amazon.com/Radiation-Days-Rollicking-Lighthearted-Cancer/dp/1628737182/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1413267592&sr=1-1&keywords=radiation+days

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I shall be leading the Adult Sex-Ed section with a talk on masturbation.  The Salon is a comfortable and safe space to talk about this and other topics on sexual behaviors.

Press Release: http://theeroticsalon.com/blog/press-release-october-21-featured-reader-award-winning-poet-lynn-hoffman/

 

Asian Shunga – Sex Pictures, How to Think More About Sex, Famous Definitions of Love

Japan has a rich sexual history. The film “Memories of a Geisha” revived this rich, bizarre & kinky history of a truly open-minded culture.  The following images are coined with the term Shunga which can be translated to “Image of Spring”. Spring is a common euphemism for sex.

Shunga art depicted everything: men seducing women, male-on-male trysts, men and women cheat on each other, woman-on-woman, threesomes, masturbation and many more bizarre scenes as you will see in the following pictures.

Shunga couples are often shown in non-realistic positions with exaggerated genitalia. Explanations for this include increased visibility of the sexually explicit content, artistic interest and psychological impact: that is, the genitalia is interpreted as a ‘second face,’ expressing the primal passions that the everyday face is obligated by giri to conceal, and is therefore the same size as the head and placed unnaturally close to it by the awkward position. [Source Wikipedia]

http://mytinysecrets.com/these-13-bizarre-pictures-depict-how-ancient-asians-loved-kinky-sex/

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Alain de Botton on How to Think More About Sex

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“The more closely we analyze what we consider ‘sexy,’ the more clearly we will understand that eroticism is the feeling of excitement we experience at finding another human being who shares our values and our sense of the meaning of existence.”

“When we hook up with another, in sex or love (or, more rarely, both) we prove that our isolation is not permanent,” Dorion Sagan — son of Carl — wrote in his fascinating history of sex. And yet that very quest to end our isolation has been subject to centuries of stigma and incessant friction with our social values. But it needn’t be this way.

Last week, The School of Life taught us how to stay sane by revising our inner stories. From the same fantastic series of intelligent, non-self-helpy, yet immensely helpful guides to modern living comes How to Think More About Sex(public libraryUK) by philosopher Alain de Botton, who has previously given us some sage advice on success, a vision for religion for atheists, and some answers to little kids’ biggest questions.

De Botton writes in the introduction:

Despite our best efforts to clean it of its peculiarities, sex will never be either simple or nice in the ways we might like it to be. It is not fundamentally democratic or kind; it is bound up with cruelty, transgression and the desire for subjugation and humiliation. It refuses to sit neatly on top of love, as it should. Tame it though we may try, sex has a recurring tendency to wreak havoc across our lives: it leads us to destroy our relationships, threatens our productivity and compels us to stay up too late in nightclubs talking to people whom we don’t like but whose exposed midriffs we nevertheless strongly wish to touch. Sex remains in absurd, and perhaps irreconcilable, conflict with some of our highest commitments and values. Unsurprisingly, we have no option but to repress its demands most of the time. We should accept sex as inherently rather weird instead of blaming ourselves for not responding in more normal ways to its confusing impulses.

This is not to say that we cannot take steps to grow wiser about sex. We should simply realize that we will never entirely surmount the difficulties it throws our way. Our best hope should be a respectful accommodation with an anarchic and reckless power.

He later offers a delightfully animated account, reminiscent of Bill Plympton’s classic animated version, of why a kiss holds the appeal that it does:

The pleasure of the moment can be understood only by considering its wider context: the overwhelming indifference against which any kiss is set. It goes almost without saying that the majority of people we encounter will be not merely uninterested in having sex with us but positively revolted by the idea. We have no choice but to keep a minimum of sixty or, even better, ninety centimeters’ distance between us and them at all times, to make it absolutely clear that our compromised selves have no intention of intruding into their personal spheres.

Then comes the kiss. The deeply private realm of the mouth — that dark, moist cavity that no one else but our dentist usually enters, where our tongue reigns supreme over a microcosm as silent and unknown as the belly of a whale — now prepares to open itself up to another. The tongue, which has had no expectation of ever meeting a compatriot, gingerly approaches a fellow member of its species, advancing with something of the reserve and curiosity exhibited by a South Sea Islander in greeting the arrival of the first European adventurer. Indentations and plateaus in the inner lining of the cheeks, hitherto thought of as solely personal, are revealed as having counterparts. The tongues engage each other in a tentative dance. …

Beneath the kiss itself, it is its meaning that interests us — which is why the desire to kiss someone can be decisively reduced… by a declaration of that desire — a confession which may in itself be so erotic as to render the actual kiss superfluous.

But the true mesmerism of sex, de Botton argues, isn’t even in the physical act itself — it’s in the existential promise that it holds:

The pleasure we derive from sex is also bound up with our recognizing, and giving a distinctive seal of approval to, those ingredients of a good life whose presence we have detected in another person. The more closely we analyze what we consider ‘sexy,’ the more clearly we will understand that eroticism is the feeling of excitement we experience at finding another human being who shares our values and our sense of the meaning of existence.

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Our culture encourages us to acknowledge very little of who we normally are in the act of sex. It seems as if it might be a purely physical process, without any psychological importance. But … what happens in love-making is closely bound up with some of our most central ambitions. The act of sex plays out through the rubbing together of organs, but our excitement is no boorish physiological reaction; rather, it is an ecstasy we feel at encountering someone who may be able to put to rest certain of our greatest fears, and with whom we may hope to build a shared life based upon common values.

Ultimately, sex is a grounding mechanism that reminds us of our own imperfect humanity, and in that imperfection lies the messy richness of being human:

Without sex, we would be dangerously invulnerable. We might believe we were not ridiculous.

Read more:

 http://www.brainpickings.org/index.php/2013/02/14/how-to-think-more-about-sex-alain-de-botton/

What Is Love? Famous Definitions from 400 Years of Literary History

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“Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get — only with what you are expecting to give — which is everything.”

After those collections of notable definitions of artscience, and philosophy, what better way to start a new year than with a selection of poetic definitions of a peculiar phenomenon that is at once more amorphous than art, more single-minded than science, and more philosophical than philosophy itself? Gathered here are some of the most memorable and timeless insights on love, culled from several hundred years of literary history — enjoy.

Kurt Vonnegut, who was in some ways an extremist about love but also had a healthy dose of irreverence about it, in The Sirens of Titan:

A purpose of human life, no matter who is controlling it, is to love whoever is around to be loved.

Anaïs Nin, whose wisdom on love knew no bounds, in A Literate Passion: Letters of Anaïs Nin & Henry Miller, 1932-1953:

What is love but acceptance of the other, whatever he is.

Read more:

http://www.brainpickings.org/index.php/2013/01/01/what-is-love/