Free – Winter of Wellness Summit – Sexuality?

I am truly hoping that sexuality is discussed in at least one of the free seminars offered by the Shift network. The speakers include Joan Borysenko (heard her speak in the 80’s, I was most impressed), Bernie Siegel, Dan Millman, Harville Hendrix, John Gray, Janet Attwood, Marianne Williamson & more.

I suspect these people are offering these seminars free so they can get your email address, and send you a lot of material. May I suggest you create an email address specifically for non-personal business.

The Summit happens January 9th – March 22nd – and you can listen in live via your phone line or computer to as many sessions as you’d like.

Full Vitality Living Can be Yours!

Every moment you have the opportunity to heal your body, radiate total health and expand your capacity to lead a vibrant, fully expressed life.

Everything from the food you eat, your thoughts and beliefs, your relationship with a higher power, others and with yourself can either diminish or expand your capacity for total health.

For much of the western medicine world, however, health has meant the absence of illness. But “optimum wellness” is about far more than the absence of illness. It’s about full vitality living.


If you know that there is more to life than just being disease-free, the Winter of Wellness Free Telesummit will help you make that your reality!

Now, you can immerse yourself in an entire season of wellness: Monday through Thursday for three months, you’ll explore and fuel the four “fires” of optimum health: Body, Mind, Heart and Spirit.

Led by pioneers in integral health, wellness and mind-body-spirit medicine, you will learn:

  • Nutritional techniques for increasing natural beauty
  • Proven mind-body technologies that slow aging and increase longevity
  • Groundbreaking health and wellness research
  • Meditation and visualization techniques to help you access your inner healing wisdom
  • Holistic approaches to creating well-being in your family and your community

Four Tracks to Enhance Your Entire Being

From January to March, you will have free access to four Winter of Wellness sessions each week.

On Mondays we’ll focus on the BODY. Tuesdays, we’ll explore the MIND. Wednesdays, we’ll move into the HEART. And on Thursdays we’ll delve into the SOUL.

As you listen to the sessions from each of these four tracks, you will discover common threads as well as different and complementary approaches to optimal health. You’ll learn how ALL parts of your being – your body, mind, heart and soul – work in harmony to create and sustain your state of health and well-being.

Begin with the BODY


Your body has an amazing capacity for healing and vitality. In fact health, vitality and a sense of well-being is your natural state! But the hectic pace of our lives and the physical, emotional and energetic stressors of our daily life often prevent us from living in a state of optimal health.

Energy medicine, nutrition, ancient practices such as Qigong and emerging, leading-edge modalities have been proven to dramatically decrease stress, build your immune system and enhance your natural beauty, slowing the aging process and boosting your emotional and spiritual vitality.

The experts in our “Body” track, including Bernie Siegel, David Wolfe, John Gray and Dan Millman, will show you how to tap into your body’s innate healing power and experience radiant health.

MIND Over Matter

Someone once said, “Age is a question of mind over matter… If you don’t mind, it don’t matter!”

You’ll discover just how powerful your mind really is and how intimately connected your mind and body really are. And you’ll be given specific processes and practices to help you use the power of your mind to create optimal wellness NOW.

But how do you create a stress-free life in this sometimes overwhelming world? Hale Dwoskin, Janet Attwood and Bruce Lipton and the other experts in our “Mind” track will show you how to do just that!

You’ll discover just how powerful your mind really is and how intimately connected your mind and body really are.

You’ll also be given specific processes and practices to help you use the power of your mind to create optimal wellness NOW.


Enter the HEART of Wellness

Some cultures believe that the heart is the key to wellness. And science has shown us that the heart possesses its own intelligence and holds emotions that affect our vitality, productivity and relationships. In fact the heart’s electromagnetic field is 60-times stronger than the brain’s. And it permeates and influences every cell in your body!

There is no question that the state of our heart impacts our overall well-being. Do you remember how your body felt the last time your heart was broken? How about the last time you fell head over heels in love? The heart DEFINITELY has a powerful impact on the way you feel!

When your heart is healthy, strong and open, your body follows. In our “Heart” track you’ll learn proven techniques and technologies (such as HeartMath) that will help you strengthen, open and expand your heart and deepen your relationships.

Marianne Williamson, Harville Hendrix, Alison Armstrong and the other leaders in our Heart track will bring new insights into the interplay between your heart, your relationships and your overall well-being.

Awaken the Power of Your SOUL

No matter how strong your body is, no matter how clear your mind is, no matter how open your heart is, without a deep connection to a higher power you cannot experience true wellness. Mystics have long recognized the health benefits of having a strong spiritual practice. And science is now confirming that knowledge.

Joan Borysenko, Eric Pearl, Grandmother Flordemayo and the other experts in our Soul track will lead you through the doorway to your Soul and teach you powerful, practical tools and techniques for awakening the wisdom of your soul and your connection to a higher power.

An Entire Season Dedicated to Wellness, Plus Two Bonus Events On the Power of Your Breath and Conscious Eating


In addition to a complete season of daily wellness programs, you’re also invited to join us for two wellness intensive summits led by top experts in breathwork and food & nutrition.

The Breathwork Summit will feature world renowned experts in many different breathwork modalities including Gay Hendricks, Stanislav Grof, Jack Kornfield and Sondra Ray. You’ll discover the capacity of your breath to help you create optimum wellness, and you’ll learn many simple techniques for using your breath to enhance your state of well-being and experience greater joy, pleasure and even ecstasy!

Then, in February, you’re invited to join us for the Conscious Foods Banquet, two days of 8-course meals where you’ll learn about healthy foods, intuitive eating, alternative diets – that actually work – and much more.

It’s All FREE – Our Gift to You

The best part is that the Winter of Wellness is entirely free. You can listen to all of the live calls and the streaming replays and pay nothing at all.

Ring in the New Year with Optimum Health

The number #1 New Year’s resolution is for better health. So what better way to make that intention a reality than to spend time each day with our holistic wellness experts?

When you commit to joining us for the Winter of Wellness you are sending a strong message to your subconscious mind that you are serious about creating optimum wellness.

Visit the website below to sign up  and watch your Body, Mind, Heart and Soul expand in joy, love and wellness!

“The Simplest Secret of Sex” plus FREE – movie “Gen Silent”

In less than two minutes you can learn “The Simplest Secret of Sex.”

A must see movie, free only until tomorrow 1/8. A critically-acclaimed LGBT aging documenting for all who have a compassionate heart.

Reminder – submission for the Salon’s unique anthology deadline is Valentine’s Day. Link to guidelines at navigation bar.

Remittance Girl – Erotic Fiction Online – Blog

Remittance Girl has a wonderful website I have added to the Erotic Literary Salon’s list of erotic writers. Find under links in the navigation bar. Here is her Manifesto:

  1. I think there is a WORLD of difference between what people fantasize about and what they actually do.
  2. If you have a difficult time understanding this difference, you should not be reading my work.
  3. I don’t hold an opinion what proclivities may or may not be considered ‘mental disorders’. I do know that homosexuality was, until very recently, assumed to be and classified as a mental disorder and, because of this, I question the reliability of these designations.
  4. I do NOT condone the making, posting, downloading or viewing of child pornography. I condemn it – both morally and legally.
  5. I do not condone rape. I condemn it. The stories that I have written that include rape – sometimes eroticised, sometimes not – are fiction and fantasy. It does NOT follow that I am ambivalent about forced sex or rape in reality. I condemn it (again.)
  6. I assume, if you have clicked past the warning page, that you have reached the age of majority in whatever place you live, and that you are sane enough to take responsibility for your actions.
  7. My stories are not intended as how-to manuals, life-style guides or psychology textbooks. I am not a psychologist, sex therapist or anything else that would qualify me to suggest how you should live your life.
  8. If you read something in my work that you find offensive, please be responsible enough to stop reading. The appeal of my work is not universal nor is it intended to be.
  9. As a woman, I have inherited the burden of thousands of years of social, religious and sexual oppression. My understanding of self, my agency, my language and my sexuality were born, molded and twisted by that oppression. I am happy to have a discussion on why I write what I write, but I will not tolerate being told what I can or cannot write about.
  10. I am not perfect and I do not exercise perfect judgment. If you assume I am, or that I do, please leave.

I love her Twitter Fiction. You may find more of her work at under Erotic Fiction Online in navigation bar. Hope you enjoy her writings as much as I do.

Intelligent Lust – In Defense of Casual Sex

The new movie “Shame” has everyone talking about sex addiction once again, or should I say still. If you have been following my blog you know I don’t believe in sex addiction any more than I believe in food addiction. These are necessary elements of life we can control, although sometimes people are out of control and do not want to take responsibility for their actions.

The following is an excellent article I found in the publication Psychology Today.

In Defense of Casual Sex

By Stanley Siegel, LCSW
Created Dec 12 2011 – 6:17pm
“In the new film “Shame,” an examination of the extremes of human sexuality,  Brandon Sullivan, a successful, handsome New York executive afraid of intimacy, has frequent, random sex with prostitutes and strangers. At work, he sneaks off to masturbate in the men’s room or extends his lunch hour with  trysts. 

The movie  harshly depicts casual sex as an emotionally disconnected, meaningless defilement, as reflected in the the title.  Brandon Sullivan is never permitted sexual enjoyment.  Instead, his getting off is presented as alienating and self-destructive.  The only time he he attempts to have sex with someone he knows, a co-worker,  he can not perform.

In the end, punishment awaits Brandon, the presumable fate for all who have casual sex, as punctuated by the suicide attempt of Brandon’ sister, who is similarly portrayed as sexually depraved.

In a recent interview, director Steve McQueen said the film is based on his research on sexual addiction–a condition whereby the insatiability of sexual cravings is rooted in self-hatred and the avoiding intimacy.

But “Shame” draws an inaccurate comparison between casual sex–an experience typically outside the context of a romantic relationship–and reckless sex. Under the right circumstances, casual sex can be deeply meaningful and more intimate than the sex in a long-term relationship. Those of us who have casual sex know that its not devoid of emotion, nor does it lead to the unhappiness Brandon suffers.

Society dictates that only within marriage or another long-term relationship do sex and intimacy exist and popular culture upholds this as the ultimate formula for happiness.  Despite the high divorce rate, tax laws, for example,  continue to bestow benefits on married couples, while relegating single people to second-class status.

How many times have you heard: He’s afraid of intimacy?  In arguing against casual sex, marriage advocates regularly flaunt research purportedly showing that spouses are happier than single people.  But these studies contain a damaging methodology, which cannot be readily identified by their findings.  That is, they fail to consider the guilt and shame that some single people internalize as a result of how society stigmatizes them.

The truth is,  long-term relationships or marriage do not guarantee a satisfying emotional life or sexual intimacy. Everyone knows someone stuck in a barren marriage, whose members have lost their autonomy and in which sex has disappeared. Brandon’s assertion that people do not belong together forever is correct, but too many of us fear facing that truth or consider alternatives to that permanence.

There are times when casual sex actually deepens one’s self-knowledge. With intelligence and clarity of purpose, casual sex is more than instant gratification. By openly exploring our fantasies and true desires with different partners in a way that may not possible in a committed relationship, we can transcend our inhibitions.  With each new encounter we can discover buried parts of ourselves and in time experience the totality of who we are. We can even experience profound, revelatory moments that unravel our past and show us things we never knew about ourselves. We can satisfy unmet needs by embracing those aspects of our sexuality that are deeply meaningful and we can choose to let go of those that no longer have importance.

Upon turning sixty-five, I recognize that casual sex has often been as intimate for me as were the two long-term relationships I have had. Unencumbered by a complex commitment, the freedom found in casual sex allowed me to move beyond self-consciousness and achieve a level of honesty and authenticity for myself, and my partner, in a way previously unknown to me. With each new experience, the process of discovering and sharing specific sexual interests required verbal and non-verbal communication that was intensely focused and rapidly telegraphed.  And  self-disclosure and vulnerability were as necessary a part of these exchanges as they were in a committed relationship.

In fact, my experience ran contrary to the myth that intimacy needs to be sustained to be meaningful. Even so, I have learned that not all casual sex is meaningful, even though you may get a physical “spike” from its novelty, but it is no more empty than the rote sex that typically happens in marriages.

Some casual encounters presented the unexpected, both splendid and repellent. Some led to love affairs, others to friendships. Together, these experiences offered insights into the deepest levels of my psyche that have been as rich and transforming as any epiphany I had during my long-term relationships. Over time, I refined my own sense of morality based on respect, trust, honesty and generosity.  Finally, I stand in awe of the extraordinarily creative ways that we, as human beings, express who we are through sex.

There is nothing that I have asked of a patient that I haven’t asked of myself. Like many other patients, I took Jane on the journey of Intelligent Lust that I have written about in previous columns and in detail in my book, “Your Brain on Sex” where casual sex is of central importance.

Jane’s younger sister got muscular dystrophy at a very young age, for which Jane’s parents felt terrible guilt. They steadfastly tended to her sister, going beyond what was necessary to accommodate her handicap.

Not only did Jane feel guilty for being the healthy child, she also suffered silently from her parent’s inattentiveness towards her and wondered what it would be like to be the center of attention. Furthermore, in high school, Jane, taller than the boys and less physically developed than the girls, was cruelly nicknamed Olive Oil.

As she matured, Jane developed sexual fantasies in which she was a beautiful enchantress who could charm and seduce even the most handsome and unavailable man.
At thirty, Jane, feeling terribly isolated, came to therapy, after suffering what she called a string of “failed relationships” with men she described as “emotionally unavailable.”
“They put their work or families ahead of me,” Jane told me.

Jane soon recognized that by choosing men who gave her so little attention she reenacted her childhood predicament. And while she was highly sexual in her relationships, she also abandoned her true sexual desires in favor of pleasing her partners whose approval she desperately sought. Sex in these relationship quickly grew empty and inauthentic, misguided by a lack of self-understanding.

During therapy, Jane learned to identify her fantasies and true desires, where they came from and what function they served in her life. She gained insight into how she had eroticized her parents’ neglect as an attempt to turn painful feelings into pleasurable ones.

At first, Jane had a variety of casual sexual encounters, some of which did not require her to please the man. Not unexpectedly, she began to honor and express her sexuality more confidently. She also approached dating with a new perspective, one that didn’t anticipate rejection.  She began to look for men who were a better sexual match, using Intelligent Lust as her guide. And she learned to replace her plain and neutral self-image with a more flirtatious and seductive one, like the enchantress she imagined herself to be.

Within a year, Jane met Bill, a man who had also been a tall and awkward adolescent with sibling issues. As a boy, Bill had been compared to his handsome and brilliant older brother. Despite his physical awkwardness, Bill was a varsity basketball player. Still, even as his star rose, he felt uncomfortable around girls and developed a reputation as a geek. In his favorite masturbatory fantasy, however, Bill imagined a harem of woman chasing him.

With my coaching, Jane got Bill to talk about his fantasies, and soon they agreed to act them out, setting up regular dates in bars. Together, they developed a script for their encounters. Pretending they didn’t know each other, Jane would flirt with the anonymous tall guy, flatter and charm him, then invite him home. At first, Bill would resist, but inevitably he would surrender to the intense seduction. In bed, he would make love to her for hours while she teased and taunted him until they both climaxed, satisfying their sexual fantasies.

The experience continued regularly over several months and as they grew more trusting of each other, Jane and Bill’s emotional and sexual exploration deepened as well as its intensity and satisfaction.

Acting out her fantasies changed Jane. She felt empowered. Not only did she feel her deepest needs had been validated and affirmed by Bill, but for the first time she felt “real.”

Although Jane ended the relationship with Bill several months later when she relocated for a job, it was a profoundly helpful experience that served to correct a lifetime of neglect. Their high level of intimacy served as a standard for her future relationships. The healing that occurred during her few months of sex in a non-committed relationship allowed Jane to vanquish her childhood hurt and feel empowered.”