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	<title>The Erotic Literary Salon: Online</title>
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	<link>http://theeroticsalon.com</link>
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		<title>Female Anatomy &#8211; The True Size of the Clitoris and more</title>
		<link>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/female-anatomy-the-true-size-of-the-clitoris-and-more/</link>
		<comments>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/female-anatomy-the-true-size-of-the-clitoris-and-more/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 06 Feb 2012 04:30:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>panasusana</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theeroticsalon.com/?p=2606</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The true size of the clitoris was not determined until the late 1990&#8242;s, when it was found to be quite large, perhaps even bigger than the penis. Although the majority...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The true size of the clitoris was not determined until the late 1990&#8242;s, when it was found to be quite large, perhaps even bigger than the penis. Although the majority of the structure lies hidden within the pelvis. Correct anatomy is most important when writing sex scenes. The following site offers information and diagrams on the clitoris and other parts of the female reproductive area. <a href="http://www.3dvulva.com/">http://www.3dvulva.com/</a></p>
<p>Painting &#8211; Georgia O&#8217;Keefe</p>
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		<title>International Kissing Day &#8211; Free Erotic Stories on Amazon</title>
		<link>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/international-kissing-day-free-erotic-stories-on-amazon/</link>
		<comments>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/international-kissing-day-free-erotic-stories-on-amazon/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 05 Feb 2012 15:53:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>panasusana</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theeroticsalon.com/?p=2602</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[My ritual suggestion to couples who live together. 10 second meaningful kiss (not the singular), preferably to start your day and also when you meet again at the end of...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>My ritual suggestion to couples who live together. 10 second meaningful kiss (not the singular), preferably to start your day and also when you meet again at the end of the day. It is most difficult to kiss passionately for that extended period of time, when you are angry. A great barometer for how you are feeling and to start a discussion if one of you is not enjoying this kiss.</p>
<p>Kissing is one of the first things people stop doing when their relationship is faltering, this stops way before fucking/making love.</p>
<p>The Top 10 Health Benefits of Kissing&#8230;  Have been documented in medical studies offering amazing advantages for a long and healthy life.<br />
1.    Those who kiss their partner goodbye each morning live five years longer than those who don’t.<br />
2.    Kissing is great for self-esteem. It makes you feel appreciated and helps your state of mind.<br />
3.    Kissing burns calories, 2-3 calories a minute and can double your metabolic rate. Research claims that three passionate kisses a day (at least lasting 20 seconds each) will cause you to loose an entire extra pound! It&#8217;s time to start that kissing diet!<br />
4.    Kissing is a known stress-reliever. Passionate kissing relieves tension, reduces negative energy and produces a sense of well being, lowering your cortisol ‘stress’ hormone.<br />
5.    Kissing uses 30 facial muscles and it helps keep the facial muscles tight, preventing baggy cheeks! The tension in the muscles caused by a passionate kiss helps smooth the skin and increases the circulation.<br />
6.    Kissing is good for the heart, as it creates an adrenaline which causes your heart to pump more blood around your body. Frequent kissing has scientifically been proven to stabilize cardiovascular activity, decrease blood pressure and cholesterol.<br />
7.    Those who kiss quite frequently are less likely to suffer from stomach, bladder and blood infections.<br />
8.    During a kiss, natural antibiotics are secreted in the saliva. Also, the saliva contains a type of anesthetic that helps relieve pain.<br />
9.    Kissing reduces anxiety and stops the &#8216;noise&#8217; in your mind. It increases the levels of oxytocin, an extremely calming hormone that produces a feeling of peace.<br />
10.    The endorphins produced by kissing are 200 times more powerful than morphine.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.bestkisses.com/kisses-for-health.html">http://www.bestkisses.com/kisses-for-health.html</a></p>
<p>Free Kindle book &#8211; Erotic Stories of Domination and Submission: The Devil&#8217;s Playground by Audra Alleyn <a href="http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00707653C">http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00707653C</a></p>
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		<item>
		<title>Seattle Erotic Art Festival &#8211; SEAF &#8211; 2012 call for art</title>
		<link>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/seattle-erotic-art-festival-seaf-2012-call-for-art/</link>
		<comments>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/seattle-erotic-art-festival-seaf-2012-call-for-art/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 02 Feb 2012 19:52:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>panasusana</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theeroticsalon.com/?p=2598</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Image is from the book, &#8220;La Figa: VIsions of Food and Form, by chef Tiberio Simone and photographer Matt Freedman&#8221; A book of edible body art. http://www.lafigaproject.com/events Now accepting submissions...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Image is from the book, &#8220;La Figa: VIsions of Food and Form, by chef Tiberio Simone and photographer Matt Freedman&#8221; A book of edible body art. <a href="http://www.lafigaproject.com/events">http://www.lafigaproject.com/events</a></p>
<p>Now accepting submissions<br />
The Call for Art is now open for the Festival&#8217;s 10th anniversay, our biggest and best year yet. Accepted artists will have their work showcased to over 10,000 attendees in June, and receive many additional benefits for participating.</p>
<p>Learn about the rewards for applying.</p>
<p>All artists age 18+ are encouraged to submit work for consideration. Artists outside of North America apply for free.</p>
<p>The Festival is seeking:<br />
Visual Art (all media)<br />
Installation Art<br />
Literary Art<br />
Short Film/Video<br />
Performance Art<br />
DJs<br />
Pieces for the Festival Store<br />
Artists may submit to as many Calls for Art as they wish, but note that each Call for Art has distinct requirements and may have submission fees.</p>
<p>Have questions? Join us February 26 for a free info session.<br />
fees and deadlines<br />
Some of the Calls for Art are free to apply for, and all artists outside of North America apply for free.</p>
<p>Submission fees are low, and you receive special benefits in exchange.</p>
<p>Take advantage of early-bird (discounted) submission fees until Wednesday, February 15 at 11pm PST.</p>
<p>Applications can be edited until the deadline: Saturday, March 10.</p>
<p>Learn more about our fees and deadlines.<br />
volunteer meeting: join us<br />
Want to be part of Seattle&#8217;s sexiest event? Learn more about how you can get involved.</p>
<p>Attend our Volunteer Info Meeting<br />
Sunday, February 19, 1-3pm<br />
Meet Festival staff<br />
Hear the exciting plans for 2012<br />
Learn about volunteer opportunities<br />
Gey your questions answered<br />
Get involved!<br />
Already know you want to volunteer?<br />
Fill out our volunteer form.</p>
<p>Join the fun of putting on the Festival&#8217;s 10th anniversary.<br />
about the Festival<br />
The Seattle Erotic Art Festival supports a vibrant, creative community, promotes freedom of expression, and fosters sex positive culture through public celebration of the arts.</p>
<p>The Festival is the flagship program of the nonprofit Foundation for Sex Positive Culture.</p>
<p>To learn more, visit our website <a href="http://www.seattleerotic.org/">SeattleErotic.org</a> or write us.</p>
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		</item>
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		<title>On Amazon, An Uneasy Mix Of Plagiarism And Erotica</title>
		<link>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/on-amazon-an-uneasy-mix-of-plagiarism-and-erotica/</link>
		<comments>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/on-amazon-an-uneasy-mix-of-plagiarism-and-erotica/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 01 Feb 2012 14:22:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>panasusana</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theeroticsalon.com/?p=2590</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Shar Azade, was interviewed on NPR, discussing the problems involved in publishing erotica. On March 20th , Shar Azade will be the featured presenter at the Erotic Literary Salon in...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Shar Azade, was interviewed on NPR, discussing the problems involved in publishing erotica. On March 20th , Shar Azade will be the featured presenter at the Erotic Literary Salon in Philadelphia. Perhaps I can convince her to discuss the phenomenon of plagiarism and erotica at the Salon.</p>
<p>Heard on All Things Considered</p>
<p>January 29, 2012 &#8211; GUY RAZ, HOST:</p>
<p>It&#8217;s  WEEKENDS on ALL THINGS CONSIDERED from NPR News. I&#8217;m Guy Raz. Amazon&#8217;s  Kindle Direct Publishing platform is already revolutionizing the world  of self-publishing. A few weeks ago, on this program, we spoke with a  paranormal romance fiction writer Amanda Hocking. She&#8217;s made more than  $2 million selling her e-books through sites like Amazon&#8217;s. And every  day, thousands of budding authors are uploading their work to the site,  creating a bookstore to rival the biggest libraries in the world. But  with that, there are problems, and one potentially huge one.</p>
<p>SHARAZADE: OK. My name is Sharazade, and I go by Shar, usually. That&#8217;s a pen name.</p>
<p>RAZ: Tell me what your books are about.</p>
<p>SHARAZADE: Well, they&#8217;re about sex.</p>
<p>RAZ: Shar is a rising star in Amazon&#8217;s erotica section.</p>
<p>SHARAZADE:  I do a lot of travelings. And most of my stories are travel-based in  some way, either set in an exotic location or having to do with modes of  transportation, trains, airplanes, buses.</p>
<p>RAZ:  But Shar is also an entrepreneur. She publishes erotica for other  writers as well, including a story she put up on Amazon recently called  &#8220;Taking Jennifer.&#8221;</p>
<p>SHARAZADE: So I was there  watching Jennifer climb up in the rankings. And on the US site, it  eventually got to number 21 in the free erotica, and on the UK site, it  got to number three. When you&#8217;re that close to the top, then you &#8211; I  think it&#8217;s natural that you look around to see what the competition is  like.</p>
<p>So I took a look at the book that was  holding fast at number one, which is a book by an author called Maria  Cruz, and the book was called &#8220;My Sister Bestfriend.</p>
<p>RAZ: &#8220;My Sister Bestfriend.&#8221;</p>
<p>SHARAZADE:  I was being beaten by a book with an ungrammatical title. I mean, it&#8217;s  one thing to be beaten by &#8220;My Sister&#8217;s Best Friend,&#8221; but, you know, &#8220;My  Sister Bestfriend&#8221;? So I clicked on the author to see what else she&#8217;d  written, and there were, I think, 42 titles of which 41 were erotica,  also, many of them with ungrammatical titles: &#8220;My Stepsister Pretty  Little Mouth,&#8221; &#8220;Domenating Her&#8221; but spelled D-O-M-E-N-A-T-I-N-G,  &#8220;Lesbian MILF Seductress: Bride Vol. One.&#8221;</p>
<p>RAZ:  Maria Cruz was clearly prolific and successful. But one title seemed  out of place. It was called &#8220;Dracula Amazing Adventure.&#8221;</p>
<p>SHARAZADE:  And, you know, I&#8217;ve worked as a college professor, and my spidey senses  were tingling. So I took a sentence from the description and I put it  between quotes and dropped it into Google and Bram Stoker&#8217;s &#8220;Dracula&#8221;  came up. It was word for word &#8220;Dracula.&#8221;</p>
<p>RAZ: Word for word.</p>
<p>SHARAZADE: Word for word, down to the correct punctuation.</p>
<p>RAZ: And once she realized &#8220;Dracula&#8221; was plagiarized, Shar became curious about Maria Cruz&#8217;s other books.</p>
<p>SHARAZADE:  So I opened up their previews, as well, and began dropping sentences  into Google, and every single one of them turned up somewhere else,  mostly from the website literotica.com.</p>
<p>RAZ:  Maria Cruz was a fraud. Shar also came across another fraudulent and  prolific author in the erotica category. He sold his books under the  name Luke Ethan. He was selling a book called &#8220;My Stepmom Loves Me,&#8221; and  it, too, was lifted from literotica.com. The original story was written  by a man named Dave Springer who lives in San Francisco. So it was the  same exact story.</p>
<p>DAVE SPRINGER: Even the misspellings.</p>
<p>RAZ: Except Luke Ethan changed the title. Originally, it&#8217;s called &#8220;I Remember Mother.&#8221;</p>
<p>SPRINGER:  I thought it was funny. I was complimented. To think that somebody felt  my writing was good enough to try to sell to other folks, and I thought  it was funny that the poor souls who were paying $3 for 28 pages online  could have gotten it from several different places for free.</p>
<p>RAZ:  Amazon sold 187 copies of the book for a total of $559.13. And who is  Luke Ethan? Well, not surprisingly, a made up name. Turns out, the man  behind the name lives in Kuwait. He claims he purchased the rights to  the book through a third party. The person who tracked Luke down and who  wrote about Shar, Dave Springer and other writers who were plagiarized  on Amazon is Adam Penenberg. His article appeared in the January issue  of Fast Company magazine. How big is this problem?</p>
<p>ADAM  PENENBERG: If you get in there and start checking out some authors,  some authors will have 30, 40, 50 different e-books that they&#8217;ll post  over a very short period of time, and &#8211; you know, in the erotica world &#8211;  and the numbers just keep growing every day. And then eventually, maybe  Amazon shuts them down because they find out that they&#8217;re plagiarized  works, and then they just start up again, sometimes under the same name  and other times under different pen names.</p>
<p>RAZ: OK. Now, why does erotica seem to be sort of ground zero of all this plagiarism?</p>
<p>PENENBERG:  You know, I think other genres are afflicted by this. There are a lot  of plagiarized books on how to. You know what they do, they find a  how-to guide on the Internet, they copy and paste it, and all of a  sudden, all these different books with that same exact information are  being sold under different names, business books, or like how to invest  in insurance funds or something like that, you know, books that are  targeted for a specific market, they&#8217;re ripe for plagiarism as well.</p>
<p>RAZ: What responsibility does Amazon have, you know, legally speaking, for this? Any?</p>
<p>PENENBERG:  Well, that is a very good question. Some might say you could point to  Amazon-Kindle&#8217;s agreement. And in it, it does say, in one of the  clauses, if you believe that your work was illegally infringed, then  Amazon-Kindle will pay you the royalties for that. Now, there&#8217;s also law  that govern this. There&#8217;s the Digital Millennium Copyright Act, and  that has some complexity as well.</p>
<p>RAZ: Well,  if Amazon says they&#8217;re going to pay you the royalties, then they should  be paying David Springer the royalties that Luke Ethan received, right?</p>
<p>PENENBERG:  You would think so. But then, it gets down to, well, who gets to decide  it&#8217;s copyright infringement? And the only one who can do that is a  judge. And that&#8217;s a pretty high standard. And so Amazon could hide  behind that.</p>
<p>RAZ: And David Springer&#8217;s clearly not going to go to court for a few hundred bucks.</p>
<p>PENENBERG: No, he&#8217;s not.</p>
<p>RAZ:  This seems to me like it&#8217;s going to be a bigger and bigger problem,  right, I mean, as e-publishing becomes more and more dominant and more  people start to self-publish online.</p>
<p>PENENBERG:  I think it&#8217;s equivalent to spam. You know, the vast majority of spam is  intercepted by ISPs and gateways, but a lot does get through. That  shows you just how much is sent. And, you know, the same thing is  happening with e-books where it&#8217;s much easier to make money.</p>
<p>All  you got to do is steal some content or make up some content, induce  someone to buy it. If there&#8217;s shame attached to erotica, that makes it  even easier because people are less likely to complain about it. And so  you end up with a situation where you can make some money, and it comes  in whether you do anything or not.</p>
<p>So you  just post it once, Amazon doesn&#8217;t see it for a while, and you get four,  five, six months&#8217; worth of royalties and, you know, make a few hundred  bucks. And if you do that enough, you do have enough books on there, you  can make some good money.</p>
<p>RAZ: That&#8217;s Adam  Penenberg. He teaches journalism at NYU. His article &#8220;Amazon&#8217;s  Plagiarism Problem&#8221; appeared in the January issue of &#8220;Fast Company&#8221;  magazine. We also reached out to Amazon to be part of the story. The  company provided a written statement that says it&#8217;s worked steadily to  detect and remove books that violate copyright. Amazon&#8217;s agreement with  authors indemnifies the company for damages against copyright  violations. And once you agree to the terms, Amazon isn&#8217;t responsible.</p>
<p>By the way, those books by Maria Cruz and Luke Ethan? They&#8217;re no longer available on amazon.com.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.npr.org/2012/01/29/146053943/on-amazon-an-uneasy-mix-of-plagiarism-and-erotica">http://www.npr.org/2012/01/29/146053943/on-amazon-an-uneasy-mix-of-plagiarism-and-erotica</a></p>
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		<title>Sexual Chocolate Beer</title>
		<link>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/sexual-chocolate-beer/</link>
		<comments>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/sexual-chocolate-beer/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 31 Jan 2012 17:01:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>panasusana</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theeroticsalon.com/?p=2587</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Does sex sell? You bet. The irony, we are not allowed to actually sell sex. http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/bestoftv/2012/01/30/exp-mxp-sexual-chocolate-beer.hln]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Does sex sell? You bet. The irony, we are not allowed to actually sell sex.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/bestoftv/2012/01/30/exp-mxp-sexual-chocolate-beer.hln">http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/bestoftv/2012/01/30/exp-mxp-sexual-chocolate-beer.hln</a></p>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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		<item>
		<title>Sleep vs. Cuddling: Study Looks at What Happens After Sex</title>
		<link>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/sleep-vs-cuddling-study-looks-at-what-happens-after-sex/</link>
		<comments>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/sleep-vs-cuddling-study-looks-at-what-happens-after-sex/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 31 Jan 2012 05:35:52 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>panasusana</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theeroticsalon.com/?p=2561</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Consider cuddling and sleeping simultaneously, no talk, just a profound tactile communication. I would consider that heavy bonding material. Sometimes studies are just too narrow in their focus and miss...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Consider cuddling and sleeping simultaneously, no talk, just a profound tactile communication. I would consider that heavy bonding material.</p>
<p>Sometimes studies are just too narrow in their focus and miss some rather good material.</p>
<p>Sleep Vs. Cuddling: Study Looks at What Happens After Sex</p>
<p id="first">ScienceDaily (Jan. 21, 2012) — Sleep versus cuddling: science is finally weighing in on what happens after sex.</p>
<p>According to a recent study by evolutionary psychologists at the  University of Michigan and Albright College in Pennsylvania, the  tendency to fall asleep first after sex is associated with greater  partner desire for bonding and affection.</p>
<p>&#8220;The more one&#8217;s partner was likely to fall asleep after sex, the  stronger the desire for bonding,&#8221; explains Daniel Kruger, research  fellow at the University of Michigan, and lead author of the study.</p>
<p>The study, published in December in the <em>Journal of Social, Evolutionary, and Cultural Psychology</em>,  examined 456 participants, who completed anonymous online surveys  assessing experiences and desires with one&#8217;s partner after sex.  Participants then indicated &#8220;who falls asleep after sex?&#8221; and &#8220;who falls  asleep first when going to bed not after sex?.&#8221;</p>
<p>Participants whose partners nodded off immediately after sex had stronger desires for post-coital cuddling and chatting.</p>
<p>&#8220;Falling asleep before one&#8217;s partner may be a non-conscious way to  foreclose on any commitment conversation after sex,&#8221; says co-author  Susan Hughes, associate professor of psychology at Albright College in  Reading, Pa.</p>
<p>The study also looked at who were more likely &#8212; men or women &#8212; to fall asleep first.</p>
<p>Despite the common stereotype, the researchers did not find it more  common for men to fall asleep first after sex. Women, however, were more  likely to fall asleep first when sex hadn&#8217;t taken place.</p>
<p>&#8220;Perhaps men stay awake longer as an artifact of mate guarding &#8212;  making sure the woman doesn&#8217;t leave them for another partner,&#8221; says  Hughes. &#8220;Men may also stay awake longer in an attempt to entice their  partner into having sex.&#8221;</p>
<p>Research on post-coital behaviors are few, the study authors say.  &#8220;The vast majority of the research on the evolutionary psychology of  human reproduction focuses on what&#8217;s before and leading up to sexual  intercourse,&#8221; says Hughes. &#8220;But reproductive strategies don&#8217;t end with  intercourse; they may influence specific behaviors directly following  sex.&#8221;</p>
<p><strong>Journal Reference</strong>:</p>
<ol>
<li>Daniel J. Kruger,  Susan M. Hughes. <strong>Tendencies to fall asleep first after sex are associated with greater partner desires for bonding and affection</strong>. <em>Journal of Social, Evolutionary, and Cultural Psychology</em>, 2011, 5(4), 239-247</li>
</ol>
<p><a href="http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2012/01/120121120112.htm">http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2012/01/120121120112.htm</a></p>
<p><em> </em></p>
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		</item>
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		<title>The Invention of the Heterosexual</title>
		<link>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/the-invention-of-the-heterosexual/</link>
		<comments>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/the-invention-of-the-heterosexual/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 30 Jan 2012 16:31:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>panasusana</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://theeroticsalon.com/?p=2572</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This interview relates to my earlier blog on Cynthia Nixon, and her choice to be gay. Just who decided on the label of heterosexual and homosexual, and to what purpose?...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>This interview relates to my earlier blog on Cynthia Nixon, and her choice to be gay. Just who decided on the label of heterosexual and homosexual, and to what purpose?</p>
<p>The history of straightness is much shorter than you&#8217;d think. An expert explains its origins</p>
<div>By <a href="http://www.salon.com/writer/thomas_rogers/">Thomas Rogers</a></div>
<div>A detail from the cover of &#8220;Straight&#8221;</div>
<div>
<p>If you met Hanne Blank and her partner on the street, you might  have a lot of trouble classifying them. While Blank looks like a  feminine woman, her partner is extremely androgynous, with little to no  facial hair and a fine smooth complexion. Hanne’s partner is neither  fully male, nor fully female; he was born with an unconventional set of  chromosomes, XXY, that provide him with both male genitalia and feminine  characteristics. As a result, Blank’s partner has been mistaken for a  gay woman, a straight man, a transman — and their relationship has been  classified as gay, straight and everything in between.</p>
<p>Blank mentions her personal story at the beginning of her provocative new history of heterosexuality, <a href="http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/straight-hanne-blank/1100572961?ean=9780807044438&amp;itm=1&amp;usri=straight+the+surprisingly+short+history+of+hetrosexuality" target="_blank">“Straight,”</a> as a way of illustrating just how artificial our notions of  “straightness” really are. In her book, Blank, a writer and historian  who has written extensively about sexuality and culture, looks at the  ways in which social trends and the rise of psychiatry conspired to  create this new category in the late 19th and early 20th century. Along  the way, she examines the changing definition of marriage, which evolved  from a businesslike agreement into a romantic union centered around  love, and how social Darwinist ideas shaped the divisions between gay  and straight. With her eye-opening book, Blank tactfully deconstructs a  facet of modern sexuality that most of us take for granted.</p>
<p>Salon spoke to Blank over the phone about the origins of  heterosexuality, the evolution of marriage and why the rise of the  “bromance” is a very good thing.</p>
<p><strong>Men and woman have been having sex for as long as there have  been humans. So how can we talk about there being a “history” of  heterosexuality?</strong></p>
<p>We can talk about there being a history of heterosexuality in the  same way that we can talk about there being a history of religions.  People have been praying to God for a really long time too, and yet the  ways people relate to the divine have specific histories. They come from  particular places, they take particular trajectories, there are  particular texts, and individuals that are important in them. There are  events, names, places, dates. It’s really very similar.</p>
<p><strong>So where does the term “heterosexual” come from?</strong></p>
<p>“Heterosexual” was actually coined in a letter at the same time as  the word “homosexual,” [in the mid-19thcentury], by an Austro-Hungarian  journalist named Károly Mária Kertbeny. He created these words as part  of his response to a piece of Prussian legislation that made same-sex  erotic behavior illegal, even in cases where the identical act performed  by a man and a woman would be considered legal. And he was one of a  couple of people who did a lot of writing and campaigning and  pamphleteering to try to change legal opinion on that matter. He coined  the words “heterosexual” and “homosexual” in a really very clever bid to  try to equalize same-sex and different-sex. His intent was to suggest  that there are these two categories in which human beings could be  sexual, that they were not part of a hierarchy, that they were just two  different flavors of the same thing.</p>
<p><strong>But the term took quite a while to catch on. How did it spread?</strong></p>
<p>Thanks to psychiatrists in the 1880s and 1890s — a part of the  medical profession that was deeply unscientific at that time. It meant  that somebody with a medical degree and all of the authority it brings  could stand up and start making value judgments using specialized  medical vocabulary and pass it off as authoritative, and basically  unquestionable.</p>
<p>Psychiatry is responsible for creating the heterosexual in largely  the same way that it is responsible for creating the various categories  of sexual deviance that we are familiar with and recognize and define  ourselves in opposition to. The period lasting from the late Victorian  era to the first 20 or 30 years of the 20th century was a time of  tremendous socioeconomic change, and people desperately wanted to give  themselves a valid identity in this new world order. One of the ways  people did that was establish themselves as sexually normative. And it  wasn’t the people who were running around thinking, “Oh, I’m a man and I  like to sleep with other men, that makes me different,” who were  creating this groundswell of change; it was the other people, the men  who were running around going, “I’m <em>not</em> a degenerate, I <em>don’t</em> want to sleep with other men, I am this thing over here that is  normative and acceptable and good and not pathological and right, that’s  what I am. That’s what I need people to understand about me, because I  need people to understand that I am a valid person and I need to be  taken seriously.”</p>
<p><strong>This also has to do with the popularity of social Darwinism at the time.</strong></p>
<p>Social Darwinism comes into play in a big way. It became important to  prove that you were part of the solution and not part of the problem in  this pell-mell, hurly-burly, crazy new social order [of the late 1800s  and early 20th century].</p>
<p><strong>So how did this change in terminology play itself out in the real world?</strong></p>
<p>I actually talked to my grandmother about this. My grandmother is 88  and she came to consciousness in a world that didn’t have heterosexuals  in it, where nobody knew that word, and certainly nobody used it to  refer to themselves. And she associates this change with Freud, whom  she’s never read but whom she’s heard a lot about. So there was this  sort of culture-wide game of telephone, if you will, in which these  authoritative medicalized ideas coming from very rarefied circles  trickled down into the larger culture. I think that for people of my  grandmother’s generation particularly, heterosexual simply became a  synecdoche for normal. And that’s certainly the way Freud talks about  it, that you know, you attain heterosexuality. There’s this process of  attaining normality. When you manage to develop yourself, or to become  developed, in the proper way, in an appropriate way, in the way that  Freud says you’re supposed to, what you end up with is a heterosexual.</p>
<p><strong>In his book “Gay New York,” George Chauncey writes about the  flip side of this, how previous to the invention of “homosexuality,”  men’s sexualities were much more fluid. Do you think that’s the case?</strong></p>
<p>Oh, absolutely. When you start operating on the principle that you  indeed can divide people into sheep and goats, then there’s also the  idea that you <em>must</em> divide people into sheep and goats and there are certain boundaries that cannot be crossed without reclassifying.</p>
<p><strong>As you point out in the book, for much of human history, marriage had absolutely nothing to do with sexuality or sex.</strong></p>
<p>It’s more that marriage didn’t have a lot to do with desire. Marriage  has always had to do with sex, and the ability to have marital sex and  preferably procreate has always been central to marriage. But what was  not so important was whether or not you necessarily wanted to have sex  with that person. It was your duty, it was paying the marriage debt, and  you were gonna do it, by golly, but  this was a co-worker, this a  partner in business enterprise — not a person you chose to satisfy your  own personal whims and desires with. If you happen to also like them and  think that they were swell or pretty or handsome then that’s great. But  that’s not what you were in it for.</p>
<p>And now everything has changed, because we now prioritize attraction,  desire, love, romance, over the strictly economic and  community-building aspects of marriage. We live in a culture now where  we find it very odd when women don’t support themselves, if somebody  chooses to be a stay-at-home mother. That is a huge change, and that’s a  huge change just in my lifetime. I’m in my early 40s and I know that  when I was a very small child those discussions were not happening in  the same way. The economic and legal enfranchisement of women has gone  hand-in-hand with both women’s and men’s ability to choose marriage  partners based on their own desire, desires for sex, love,  companionship, all of those things, and to put that first.</p>
<p><strong>How do the successes of the women’s movement impact our concept of heterosexuality?</strong></p>
<p>I think that referring to it as the success of the women’s movement  is a little bit of a misnomer because there’ve been multiple women’s  movements, and also because it’s not entirely to be credited to or  blamed on organized feminism. There’s been a lot of other  enfranchisement of women that’s gone on as well that has actually been  not identifiably feminist, but definitely comes out of a very  18thcentury spirit of egalitarianism. But in general I think that equal  rights egalitarianism has had an enormous amount to do with changing  heterosexuality. Simply because once you give women and men equal or  nearly equal rights to their own economic autonomy, political autonomy,  social autonomy, you change the playing field, you change the dependency  relationship.</p>
<p><strong>Over the last decade, there’s been a lot of science arguing  that there are physical differences between gay people and straight  people, in their brains and even the direction of their hair whirls.  You’re skeptical of this research. Why?</strong></p>
<p>I question their validity primarily because nobody has established or  in fact attempted to establish that there is a canonical straight body.  And if you don’t have characterized control, you can bet your bottom  dollar I am not going to believe your hypothesis. It’s really that  simple.</p>
<p>All of this research that is purporting to look for physiological  material differences between gay bodies and straight bodies: What are  they comparing it to?  Their assumption that they know magically what a  heterosexual body is?  When no one has actually established what that  is.  That’s bad science.</p>
<p><strong>OK. Then do you think it’s possible to establish what a heterosexual body looks like?</strong></p>
<p>Well, you know, if you’re going to stipulate that it’s possible to  establish what a non-heterosexual body is, it better damn well be  possible to find out what a heterosexual body is.  And if one of those  things is not possible, then, chances are, the other is not either.</p>
<p><strong>I’m quite attached to my identity as a gay man — and, to be  honest, I would feel a little troubled having my category taken away  from me.</strong></p>
<p>See, that’s the thing, no one is going to take that away from you.   No one can take that away from you. The only thing they can take away  from you is the illusion that this is not something that is  constructed.  And that’s very, very different.  Just because something  is constructed as a social category, doesn’t mean that it’s not  enormously meaningful.  It doesn’t mean that we haven’t built a whole  damn civilization on it. Doesn’t mean that we don’t live our daily lives  on it, doesn’t mean that we don’t use it all the time every time we’re  walking down the street.  This is real.  It’s stuff that has physical  manifestations in the real world. But that does not mean that it is  organic.</p>
<p><strong>Or innate.</strong></p>
<p>Or inevitable.</p>
<p><strong>But these categories have also been very practical. Gay rights wouldn’t be imaginable without them.</strong></p>
<p>Well, you know, minority politics has been a lot easier to sell than  to just say, “Being human ought to get you human dignity,” full stop. If  you can pin down the difference, if you can make the difference the  salient issue, it somehow makes it easier for people to stomach the fact  that they can’t go out and just beat people over the head.  I don’t  know why that is.  I find it intensely frustrating.</p>
<p><strong>Do you think the success of the gay rights movement is helping broaden our ideas of sexuality?</strong></p>
<p>I think that it is having an interesting effect of making the  boundaries of the categories more permeable.  Simply because we now have  this doxa [omnipresent acknowledgement] of gayness in our culture where  we believe that gayness is a thing, we believe that it exists, we  believe that we know what it looks like, we believe that we know what it  acts like, and therefore, when we see it, we’re actually very likely to  say, “Hey, that over there, that looks really gay,” regardless of  whether or not that person may be, in fact, gay.</p>
<p>Those boundaries are becoming more porous. The term “bromance” cracks  me up, but it is also promising. For the past hundred years or so, a  lot of men have found it very difficult to express affection and love  for other men without having it assumed that that love is necessarily  sexual.  And now we’re actually coming around to a place where at least  some people, some of the time, are able to avail themselves of a  category in which they can say, “Oh, OK, here’s a way that men can be  affectionate toward each other and one another and love one another and  we don’t have to assume that we know more about it than that.”  I think  that that adds something to the conversation.</p>
<p><strong>Women, in particular, seem to be eschewing the traditional  between binaries of gay and straight these days, at least in pop  culture. The same thing doesn’t seem to be true of men.</strong></p>
<p>There’s a reason for that. Every queer woman I know — and I’m a queer  woman — understands intuitively that a lot of people don’t consider  what two women do together sexually as sex.  It’s a whole lot easier to  fly under the radar when what you’re doing is not something that a lot  of people are even going to consider as sex.</p>
<p><strong>But men, for various other cultural reasons also seem to be  more attached to categories. It functions partly as a sort of safety  mechanism. </strong></p>
<p>I think there is a lot of safety in categories.  And there’s a hell  of a lot of safety in a binary. When you can just say, you know,  anything that is not this is automatically that.  You know, it frees up a  lot of spare time.</p>
<p><strong>I have a number of friends who are negotiating the reverse of  this, in that they for a long time identified as lesbians and have now  started dating transmen and now have to negotiate the awkwardness of  being in what ostensibly looks like a heterosexual relationship. I’ve  been around several friends who, when they mention their boyfriend in a  queer setting, reflexively say, “Oh, but he’s trans.”</strong></p>
<p>And I think that really points as well to the fact that these are  constructed categories.  This is about your subjectivity, it’s about  your allegiance, it’s about where your social networks are, it’s about  the kinds of cultural priorities that you embrace and that you endorse.  This is not just what gets you hard or what gets you wet. This is not  just about what kinds of sex you have, or the congenital configurations  of the people you have sex with.  It’s very much about what cultures you  participate in.  What cultures you ally yourself with, you know, whose  flag you fly.</p>
<p><strong>It’s interesting that transgender men and women could marry  their partners long before gay people could get married, even though  they are probably far more despised by conservatives in this country,  simply because they fit into this heterosexual idea of marriage.</strong></p>
<p>Although, that’s not uniformly true and there have been cases, like  Littleton v. Prange in Texas — which still to this day breaks my heart —  where jurisdictions refused to uphold the legality of marriage or  partnerships involving a trans person, because they basically take the  stance that you can’t change genetics and this is person was never a  whatever.  And therefore the marriage is not valid.  So it does cut both  ways.  I do think that the issue of gay marriage is a very interesting  one to look at in the context of the history of sexuality, because what I  think it testifies to is not so much the tendency that  non-heterosexuality has to destabilize heterosexual culture, but the  incredible depth of the investment that our culture and our government  have in regulating the kinds of relationships that people have in their  lives.</p>
<p><a href="http://http://www.salon.com/2012/01/22/the_invention_of_the_heterosexual/singleton/">http://www.salon.com/2012/01/22/the_invention_of_the_heterosexual/singleton/</a></p>
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		<title>I Kiss so Hot &#8211; Sexy Opera</title>
		<link>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/i-kiss-so-hot-sexy-opera/</link>
		<comments>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/i-kiss-so-hot-sexy-opera/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 30 Jan 2012 00:10:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>panasusana</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[I enjoy exposing my followers to various erotic / sexy styles of entertainment. If you have never Opera, this 5 minute flirtatious aria sung by Danielle de Niese is a...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I enjoy exposing my followers to various erotic / sexy styles of entertainment. If you have never Opera, this 5 minute flirtatious aria sung by Danielle de Niese is a great way to start.</p>
<p>&#8220;Can opera be ever-so-slightly sexy? The glorious soprano Danielle de  Niese shows how, singing the flirty &#8220;Meine Lippen, sie küssen so heiss.&#8221;  Which, translated, means, as you might guess: &#8220;I kiss so hot.&#8221; From  Giuditta by Frans Lehár; accompanist: Ingrid Surgenor.&#8221;</p>
<p><a href="http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/en/danielle_de_niese_a_flirtatious_aria.html">http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/en/danielle_de_niese_a_flirtatious_aria.html</a></p>
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		<title>Cynthia Nixon says she&#8217;s gay by &#8216;choice.&#8217; Is it really a choice?</title>
		<link>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/cynthia-nixon-says-shes-gay-by-choice-is-it-really-a-choice/</link>
		<comments>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/cynthia-nixon-says-shes-gay-by-choice-is-it-really-a-choice/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 28 Jan 2012 04:20:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>panasusana</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[There are differences between sexual identity, sexual orientation and sexual behavior. I will offer future Salons in Philadelphia where these topics will be explored and discussed. The bottom line is,...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>There are differences between sexual identity, sexual orientation and sexual behavior. I will offer future Salons in Philadelphia where these topics will be explored and discussed. The bottom line is, some people feel they have more choices than others when it comes to sexual orientation, society labels them bisexual. Cynthia Nixon may be one of these individuals.</p>
<p>Personally I abhor these labels, since I believe we have the capability of living our lives on a continuum range. It is the combination of genetics, experience and society that influence our choices. Labels pigeonhole our choices.</p>
<p>The gay community was upset by Cynthia&#8217;s choice of &#8216;choice.&#8217;</p>
<p>Cynthia Nixon says she&#8217;s gay by &#8216;choice.&#8217; Is it really a choice?</p>
<p>By Karen Kaplan, Los Angeles Times/For the Booster Shots blog</p>
<p>11:47 AM PST, January 25, 2012</p>
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<p>Former “Sex and the City” star Cynthia Nixon says she is gay  by “choice” – a statement that has riled many gay rights activitists who  insist that people don’t choose their sexual orientation.</p>
<p>Here’s what Nixon, who recently shaved her head to play a cancer patient  in a Broadway production of “Wit,” told the New York Times Magazine:</p>
<p>“I gave a speech recently, an empowerment speech to a gay audience, and  it included the line ‘I’ve been straight and I’ve been gay, and gay is  better.’ And they tried to get me to change it, because they said it  implies that homosexuality can be a choice. And for me, it is a choice. I  understand that for many people it’s not, but for me it’s a choice, and  you don’t get to define my gayness for me.”</p>
<p>The question of whether sexual orientation is subject to nature or  nurture – or some combination of both – has been hotly debated for  years. If it is not an immutable characteristic, that would imply that a  gay person could be somehow transformed into a straight one. In other  words, homosexuality could be “cured.” Which in turn implies that being  gay is some sort of illness.</p>
<p>Hence, the offense taken to this point of view.</p>
<p>Nixon seemed to anticipate the controversy her remarks might generate. She also told the New York Times:</p>
<p>“A certain section of our community is very concerned that it not be  seen as a choice, because if it’s a choice, then we could opt out. I say  it doesn’t matter if we flew here or we swam here, it matters that we  are here and we are one group and let us stop trying to make a litmus  test for who is considered gay and who is not.” Her face was red and her  arms were waving. “As you can tell,” she said, “I am very annoyed about  this issue. Why can’t it be a choice? Why is that any less legitimate?  It seems we’re just ceding this point to bigots who are demanding it,  and I don’t think that they should define the terms of the debate. I  also feel like people think I was walking around in a cloud and didn’t  realize I was gay, which I find really offensive. I find it offensive to  me, but I also find it offensive to all the men I’ve been out with.”</p>
<p>As expected, this did not go over smoothly with everyone. Writing on <a href="http://gay.americablog.com/">AmericaBlog Gay</a>,  John Aravosis wrote that Nixon “needs to learn how to choose her words  better, because she just fell into a right-wing trap, willingly. When  the religious right says it&#8217;s a choice, they mean you quite literally  choose your sexual orientation, you can change it at will, and that&#8217;s  bull.”</p>
<p>So, what’s the scientific evidence that sexual orientation is either a biologically determined trait or an actual choice?</p>
<p>A <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed?term=invest%20clin%20sexual%20orientation%202009">Spanish study</a> published in 2009 in the journal Investigacion Clinica summarizes the  evidence for genetic influences. Based on research comparing identical  twins, fraternal twins and even siblings who were adopted, scientists  have determined that 27% to 76% of the chance that one is gay is  determined by DNA. The genetic influence appears to be greater for men  than for women, according to the study.</p>
<p>Other stuff is probably happening in utero that influences one’s sexual orientation. As <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21693676%20">a review article</a> published last year in the journal Endocrinology explains, exposure to  atypical levels of testosterone and other steroids in the womb is  probably responsible for some people being gay. <a href="http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21333673">Another review article</a>, published last year in Frontiers in Neuroendocrinology, makes the same point:</p>
<p>“The evidence supports a role for prenatal testosterone exposure in the  development of sex-typed interests in childhood, as well as in sexual  orientation in later life, at least for some individuals. It appears,  however, that other factors, in addition to hormones, play an important  role in determining sexual orientation. These factors have not been  well-characterized, but possibilities include direct genetic effects,  and effects of maternal factors during pregnancy.”</p>
<p>One of those prenatal influences may be the number of males who have  previously inhabited the mother’s uterus. It may sound strange, but  Canadian researchers have found that “having one or more older brothers  boosts the likelihood of a boy growing up to be gay,” <a href="http://articles.latimes.com/2006/jun/27/science/sci-brothers27%20">as I explained</a> in a 2006 Los Angeles Times story. As I wrote at the time, “The  so-called fraternal birth order effect is small: Each older brother  increases the chances by 33%. Assuming the base rate of homosexuality  among men is 2%, it would take 11 older brothers to give the next son  about a 50-50 chance of being gay.” Those findings were reported in  Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.</p>
<p>In addition, my colleague Shari Roan wrote about a <a href="http://articles.latimes.com/2010/aug/15/science/la-sci-adrenal-20100815%20">fascinating controversy</a> surrounding treatment for a rare condition called congenital adrenal  hyperplasia. The disorder can cause girls to be born with genitals that  look male, making it hard to tell the baby’s gender. One treatment is to  give women hormones during subsequent pregnancies to reduce the risk  for siblings. But doctors have found that this approach has an unusual  side effect:</p>
<p>“The treatment might reduce the likelihood that a female with the  condition will be homosexual,” Roan wrote. “Further, it seems to  increase the chances that she will have what are considered more  feminine behavioral traits.”</p>
<p>This is all just the tip of the iceberg. But the scientific consensus  seems to be that there is indeed a biological basis for homosexuality –  though it’s not necessarily 100% determined by either genes or by  environmental factors.</p>
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<p>Copyright © 2012, <a href="http://www.latimes.com/" target="_blank">Los Angeles Times</a></p>
<p><a href="http://www.latimes.com/health/boostershots/la-heb-cynthia-nixon-gay-by-choice-20120125,0,2504094.story">http://www.latimes.com/health/boostershots/la-heb-cynthia-nixon-gay-by-choice-20120125,0,2504094.story</a></p>
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		<title>Good in bed: Your Guide to a Better Sex Life</title>
		<link>http://theeroticsalon.com/uncategorized/good-in-bed-your-guide-to-a-better-sex-life/</link>
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		<pubDate>Thu, 26 Jan 2012 15:37:34 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>panasusana</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[I enjoy presenting websites I think will add to your knowledge of sexuality and help enhance your writing. The Good in bed mission statement is below. They also provide articles...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I enjoy presenting websites I think will add to your knowledge of sexuality and help enhance your writing. The Good in bed mission statement is below. They also provide articles and links to various ebooks. I&#8217;m still in the process of writing my Ageless Sex Life ebook, hope to be published soon.</p>
<p>Sample of Advice from the Experts on their site:</p>
<p>Relationship Boredom, &#8220;meant to be&#8221; monogamous, Understanding Hypersexuality ( sex addiction)</p>
<p>Mission</p>
<p>The World Health Organization estimates that more than 100 million acts of sex occur every day.</p>
<p>Did you get yours? If so, how was it?</p>
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<p>According to CNN, over 40 million Americans are stuck in a sex rut  and more than 52 percent of Americans are dissatisfied with their sex  lives.</p>
<p>At Good in Bed, we’re looking to change all that.</p>
<p>Our mission is to revolutionize the way the people learn about sex.  We know that it isn’t easy to walk into a bookstore and buy a book about  sex, much less read one on your lunch break. That’s why all of our Good  in Bed Guides are &#8220;blush-free&#8221; and downloadable in an instant to your  computer, smart phone or other digital device. They are private,  printable and portable. And always up to date with the latest  information.</p>
<p>All of our e-Guides are written by credentialed experts who are  passionate about their subjects and respected in their fields. And  because Good in Bed is a digital publisher, we can bring you their  expertise at a fraction of the cost of a traditional paperback.</p>
<p>When it comes to your sex life, we know we can’t guarantee  satisfaction. That part is up to you. But we can help. In addition to  publishing our premium e‑Guides, we offer a library of free content and a  respectful community in which individuals and experts can interact.  Talking about sex isn’t easy, but, in the end, not talking about sex is  even harder.</p>
<p>You only have one sex life, and we want to help you live it to the fullest.</p>
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