Category: Slideshow

Women Want More Sex, Listen to MurmurationImprov Recorded at the Erotic Literary Salon

When Women Wanted Much More Sex Than Men

Please read this most interesting article describing the transition of women to men wanting more sex. Excerpts below:

By Alyssa Goldstein 

In the 1600s, a man named James Mattock was expelled from the First Church of Boston. His crime? It wasn’t using lewd language or smiling on the sabbath or anything else that we might think the Puritans had disapproved of. Rather, James Mattock had refused to have sex with his wife for two years. Though Mattock’s community clearly saw his self-deprivation as improper, it is quite possible that they had his wife’s suffering in mind when they decided to shun him. The Puritans believed that sexual desire was a normal and natural part of human life for both men and women (as long as it was heterosexual and confined to marriage), but that women wanted and needed sex more than men. A man could choose to give up sex with relatively little trouble, but for a woman to be so deprived would be much more difficult for her.

Yet today, the idea that men are more interested in sex than women is so pervasive that it seems almost unremarkable. Whether it’s because of hormone levels or “human nature,” men just need to have sex, masturbate, and look at porn in a way that simply isn’t necessary for women, according to popular assumptions (and if a women does find it so necessary, there’s probably something wrong with her). Women must be convinced, persuaded, even forced into “giving it up,” because the prospect of sex just isn’t that appealing on its own, say popular stereotypes. Sex for women is usually a somewhat distasteful but necessary act that must be performed to win approval, financial support, or to maintain a stable relationship. And since women are not slaves to their desires like men, they are responsible for ensuring that they aren’t “taken advantage of.”

The idea that men are naturally more interested in sex than women is ubiquitous that it’s difficult to imagine that people ever believed differently. And yet for most of Western history, from ancient Greece to beginning of the nineteenth century, women were assumed to be the sex-crazed porn fiends of their day. In one ancient Greek myth [3], Zeus and Hera argue about whether men or women enjoy sex more. They ask the prophet Tiresias, whom Hera had once transformed into a woman, to settle the debate. He answers, “if sexual pleasure were divided into ten parts, only one part would go to the man, and and nine parts to the woman.” Later, women were considered to be temptresses who inherited their treachery from Eve. Their sexual passion was seen as a sign of their inferior morality, reason and intellect, and justified tight control by husbands and fathers. Men, who were not so consumed with lust and who had superior abilities of self-control, were the gender more naturally suited to holding positions of power and influence.

Early twentieth-century physician and psychologist Havelock Ellis may have been the first to document the ideological change that had recently taken place. In his 1903 work Studies in the Psychology of Sex [3], he cites a laundry list of ancient and modern historical sources ranging from Europe to Greece, the Middle East to China, all of nearly the same mind about women’s greater sexual desire. In the 1600s, for instance, Francisco Plazzonus deduced that childbirth would hardly be worthwhile for women if the pleasure they derived from sex was not far greater than that of men’s. Montaigne, Ellis notes, considered women to be “incomparably more apt and more ardent in love than men are, and that in this matter they always know far more than men can teach them, for ‘it is a discipline that is born in their veins.’” The idea of women’s passionlessness had not yet fully taken hold in Ellis’ own time, either. Ellis’ contemporary, the Austrian gynecologist Enoch Heinrich Kisch, went so far as to state that “The sexual impulse is so powerful in women that at certain periods of life its primitive force dominates her whole nature.”

Yet the times were clearly changing. In 1891, H. Fehling tried to debunk the common wisdom: “It is an altogether false idea that a young woman has just as strong an impulse to the opposite sex as a young man…. The appearance of the sexual side in the love of a young girl is pathological.” In 1896, Bernhard Windscheid postulated, “In the normal woman, especially of the higher social classes, the sexual instinct is acquired, not inborn; when it is inborn, or awakes by itself, there is abnormality. Since women do not know this instinct before marriage, they do not miss it when they have no occasion in life to learn it.”

So what happened?

Read the answer and more at: http://www.alternet.org/when-women-wanted-sex-much-more-men

MurmurationImprov: Recorded 2/19/2013, in honor of Valentine’s Day they played and sang to the 6 word love letters/hate letters written by the attendees.

 

“SenSexual: A Unique Anthology 2013” – Press Release – PRweb

The Erotic Literary Salon Announces the Release of “SenSexual: A Unique Anthology 2013,” Volumes 1 & 2, Edited by Susana Mayer, Ph.D., Sexologist

 

Not your typical erotica. This groundbreaking ebook is the first to deliver a rainbow of styles, settings, characters, and intensity to challenge stereotypes & expand the readers’ literary and erotic horizons.

 

(PRWEB) March 19, 2013 — “SenSexual: A Unique Anthology 2013,” is a treasury of short stories, anecdotes, essays, poems, diaries, memoirs, letters, emails and sextings. The generous selection of styles, settings, characters and intensity encourages individuals and couples to share erotic fantasies and explore what turns them on.

“SenSexual: A Unique Anthology 2013” Kindle ebook on Amazon

Free Kindle app for all electronic devices, available on Amazon

Fifty authors have contributed tender memories of love, spirited sex and spicy communications, transporting the reader through seductive, romantic, occasionally kinky works to celebrate the diversity of sexual fascinations and desires. The unusual mix of writings in this two-volume anthology are filled with learning and yearning.  con’t below –

Reviews on Amazon

“…What is most striking is the honesty and purity of the emotions depicted with these written words. It is not the work of writers looking to shape their work to meet a set of pre-requisite genre demands, to grind out specific sexual content to satisfy an editor, to pad the length of their work to meet a stringent word count. It’s all from the heart…Hitch a ride on this Sensexual magic carpet and be prepared for a unique and intimate journey.

A must read!” IJM

“A selection of insightful, teasing, truly sensual, fun erotic tales!…A story for every taste where the authors have not confined themselves to “commercialized’ formulas of erotica writing for a quick sale.”
VioDE

“SenSexual: A Unique Anthology 2013” offers readers a glimpse into the monthly, standing-room-only, Erotic Literary Salon in Philadelphia. A similar mix of brazen writings, along with the authors’ illuminating backstories and the editor’s occasional unique insights, create the atmosphere of the Salon in print.

“SenSexual: A Unique Anthology 2013” takes people beyond “Fifty Shade of Grey.” Dr. Susana Mayer sexologist, Ageless Sex LifeTM crusader, founder of the Erotic Literary Salon, and editor of this text, recommends both men and women share this book with their intimate partner, friends and book club members. It will spark a conversation or discussion that will range from entertaining to life-changing.

The book is dedicated to Dr. Frances Seidman, psychologist and former head of a distinguished family and marriage clinic for over 30 years. Dr. Seidman first started writing erotica at 91, specifically for the Erotic Literary Salon founded in 2008. Included in this text are a dozen of her sexual memoir entries, early love letters (written when she was 18), and spicy short stories. Individuals attending the Salon have said her mere presence gave them permission to feel comfortable with erotica. Her writings will most likely do the same for people who have shame or guilt regarding verbal turn-ons. She is most proud of her authorized reading of the New York Times best seller “Go the Fok to Sleep,” which can be viewed on Youtube at the Erotic Literary Salon channel.

About the Erotic Literary Salon-live: Susana Mayer, Ph.D., is the host of this monthly event. Unique in the English-speaking world, the Salon offers a safe and comfortable space for authors and wannabe writers to share their uncensored writings. Since 2008 Dr. Mayer has acted as muse, encouraging attendees to find their sexual voice through writing and sharing at the Salon. She also lends her expertise during the guided discussions and between readings, often enlightening the audience with sexually related scientific research and news. The Erotic Literary Salon has recently established the SenSexual Press to launch these first volumes in a planned series of anthologies, along with distinctive (occasionally controversial!) fictional and nonfiction books focusing on sexuality and erotica.

About the Erotic Literary Salon-on-line: Susana Mayer, Ph.D., brings her expertise in human sexuality to the website where erotica and sex converge. The daily blog is filled with information pertaining to sexually explicit material, sexuality, adult sex-education, sex news, and events, along with Salon guidelines and monthly press releases.

About the cover designer: Arnold Skolnick, painter, photographer and award winning book designer illustrated the controversial 1969 publication, “The Picture Book of Sexual Love.” Some of those original photographs were reissued in the book “LoveSong” and adorn the covers of this anthology. Arnold is also known for his design of the original Woodstock poster. Contact: askolnick5 (at) gmail (dot) com

http://www.prweb.com/releases/2013/3/prweb10519680.htm

 

Kink – BDSM – Safewords – Harvard College Munch – “Fifty Shades of Grey”

The New York Time’s Fashion & Style article about Bondage, Domination, Sadism & Masochism, by Matt Haber: A Hush-Hush Topic No More, (begins under photo).

I personally am waiting for the day that people don’t ask your identity, i.e. “Are you gay?” because it doesn’t matter – sexuality is fluid. Also, a time when it doesn’t matter whether you are open or closed about your sexual behavior preferences, because  the only person to care would be the recipient of your behaviors.

The need for public display I believe is the need for acceptance. Once we feel comfortable with who we are and what we do we can just live freely. Wouldn’t that be lovely, but probably pie in the sky based on how my anthology and cover art (gorgeous art photos) are being handled by Amazon and Press Release company. For some strange reason BDSM is having its day, but nudity is still being filtered.

http://fort-o.deviantart.com/art/bdsm-144887736

Excerpts for NYTimes article:

…Paddles is not another trendy table tennis emporium, but a “safe space” to live out erotic fantasies, specifically BDSM (bondage/discipline, domination/submission, sadism/masochism), OTK (over the knee; in other words, spanking), and an alphabet soup’s worth of other sexual practices that, until recently, have gone largely unnoticed and undiscussed by the mainstream world.

But surely in part because of the blockbuster success of E. L. James’s “Fifty Shades of Grey” trilogy (65 million copies sold worldwide according to Publishers Weekly), people who are drawn to power exchange in sexuality and may refer to themselves as kinky are finding themselves in the spotlight as never before….

Though the Harvard College Munch, a social group of around 30 students focusing on kinky interests, was officially recognized by the university in December, its 21-year-old founding president asked that he not be identified. (“I’m interested in politics,” he offered as one reason.) He said that he had “encountered zero negative responses on campus,” and received messages from alumni expressing solidarity and wishing there had been a similar group when they were undergraduates.

A 20-year-old college student and self-described submissive on Long Island who asked to be referred to only by her middle name, Marie, said that she was disowned by her parents when a partner’s lover outed her as kinky. “They were just beside themselves,” Marie said. “I think they were worried I would get hurt….”

Read entire article:

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/02/28/fashion/bondage-domination-and-kink-sex-communities-step-into-view.html?_r=1&adxnnl=1&pagewanted=all&adxnnlx=1362499373-e91vjAQSGFosNAFHCtJ1Dw&

CatalystCon East 2013 – CSC – Center for Sex and Culture

My attention has been focused on CatalystCon East 2013 since last Friday. A few highlights from conference – attended a pre-conference seminar lead by Tristan Taormino – sex educator boot camp, Carol Queen & Robert Lawrence’s fireside chat (Founders of Center for Sex & Culture), also I read excerpts from, “SenSexual: A Unique Anthology 2013” at Rachel Kramer Bussel’s, ‘In the Flesh’ presentation along with all the other folks in this pix, minus Cunning Minx who had to depart early.

Joan PriceRegie CabicoReid MihalkoRachel Kramer BusselCarol QueenMo BeasleyRobin SampsonSusana MayerCameryn MooreEmily McCay and Elle LadyCheeky Chase